Wednesday, September 19, 2007

Force Nine Why-ning

* Why, when I decide I really must do a load of washing, does it immediately begin to rain?

* Why does it never rain all the rest of the time?

* Why do people not actually read the emails in which I have taken such trouble to explain as clearly and simply as possible what the problem/issue/question is, thereby creating completely unnecessary confusion and wasting yet more time?

* Why do so many people want things finished and delivered by the end of September?

* Why, on a day when one cat heaves up a gigantic furball on the sofa and the other one escapes out into the street to play with the trucks and the Rottweilers, do they do those things at exactly the same time?

* Why do strangers ring up begging for money just as I have started a complicated sentence, thereby dooming me never to finish it?

* Why do the delivery people think that the small space in my driveway between my car and the gates is an appropriate place to leave a delivery for next door -- a huge, unwieldy parcel three-quarters as tall as I am and almost too heavy and awkward to lift if one heeds the This Way Up sign -- without knocking on my door or leaving any other kind of notification that that is what they have done?

* Why can I never convince my hairdresser that I do actually want my fringe about an inch and a half shorter than that?

12 comments:

Mindy said...

The only way to deal with hairdressers is to take drastic steps. Before you go, hack off at least half an inch yourself, so she is forced to cut it shorter to fix it up. I wouldn't attempt to use her scissors in the salon, you may find yourself with an eye full of hair spray.

meggie said...

Right with you on the hairdresser thing! I must say, Mindy has an intriguing solution.
As to all the other things, well it is the CCTPPO. cosmic conspiracy to piss people off.

Jaycee said...

I'm always telling my hairdresser to show no mercy with the fringe - the shorter the better.

ThirdCat said...

"Why do people not actually read the emails in which I have taken such trouble to explain as clearly and simply as possible what the problem/issue/question is, thereby creating completely unnecessary confusion and wasting yet more time?"

Because for all its strengths and wonders, email is a shit form of communication. Maybe shit is too harsh, but flawed. People don't fully get that it isn't a passive form of communication. That they have to read actively.

genevieve said...

My husband is full of wonder at the initiative of a government office somewhere in NZ where they have one day a week email free.
Apparently they are trying to get people to remember what it's like without it or something. Whether that affects how they behave the other four days is hard to know though.
Those parcel men should be... well, shot really.

Bernice said...

But if 'we' read emails in a passive sense, I wanna know why. Is it the medium? If so, do we then read blogs in the same manner? All cyber material in the same manner? How then does a website function in a commercial sense? Is it merely faciliating the finalisation of a decision largely made already? Is it therefore a post-it note culture of actively reinforcing the assumed?

Kathleen said...

Oh, that email-free day is gold! I might institute my own personal email-free day. I was sick on Monday, and spent all Tuesday (literally ALL Tuesday) responding to Monday's emails. So the lag has continued...

My personal beef with emails is: why do people email asking you how to do something...you respond with instructions...they are incapable of reading and following them...they email you to tell you that your solution doesn't work.

Um. Yes. It. Does.

Perhaps your email-free day equivalent, PC, would be letting all phone calls go through to an answering machine/message bank?

BK said...

"Why, when I decide I really must do a load of washing, does it immediately begin to rain?

* Why does it never rain all the rest of the time?"

I see a solution to the drought problem.

elsewhere said...

Hairdressers don't seem to realise that the fringe they cut only lasts one-and-half weeks, so you want something with more longevity (but not length) till you next see them.

The problem is, if you make an issue of it, they get a bit thing around you.

mindy *is* brave.

Ampersand Duck said...

Note from another two-cats person: It's NOT coincidence. The furball was a deliberate distraction decoy. Be warned -- one cat now owes a favour to the other.

Mindy said...

I'd better fess up to not actually having tried it. Yet. I may have too since I seem to have a fringe in my eyes two weeks after a haircut. Maybe they do it on purpose?

mummified said...

You think whining is bad. TRy procrastination !