I found this meme at Sorrow at Sills Bend, to where it had been imported from Lorraine Crescent. There are all sorts of urgent things to do, but they can wait a bit. Haven't done a meme for yonks.
It is, of course, a meme designed for American teenagers, which means that some of it is incomprehensible.
1. Are you dating the last person you kissed?
The last person I kissed was my dad. Ew.
2. Pretend you've had 10 beers. what you would be doing right now?
3. What do you want?
4. Who was the last person you shared a bed with?
That would be the Bloke.
5. Do you talk to yourself?
Yes, quite a lot. Mostly to upbraid and criticise, unfortunately.
6. Do you drink milk straight from the carton?
7. Who knows the latest secret about you?
If anyone knew, it wouldn't be a secret, would it.
8. How long is your hair?
All kinds of lengths.
9. Do you like Batman?
No, I think Batman is lame.
10. Who was the last person who told you they loved you?
That would probably be the Bloke too.
13. Do you like anyone now?
All kinds of people, yes.
14. When was the last time you lied?
Can't remember; I'm quite a truthful rodent as a rule.
16. Is your birthday on a holiday?
No, but it is quite euphonious and therefore tends to turn up in lugubrious traditional English ballads from time to time.
17. What instant messaging service do you use?
18.Last thing you cooked today?
Coffee, in one of those silver things with a waist.
19. Did you have a nap today?
Yes, and it's still only 1350 hrs.
20. Who's house did you go to last?
That's 'whose' house, you dill. The answer is Judy and Graeme's and a very fine evening it was, involving rack of lamb and freshly cooked apricots, Part 2 of Jane Eyre, some truly excellent conversation* and an adorable dog.
*Judy had just finished writing this.
21. What do you wear more, jeans or sweats?
'Sweats' is a disgusting term for an item of clothing.
22. Why is the sky blue?
Because this is Adelaide. Hooray.
23. Do you like green beans?
Yes. And the yellow ones, and red ones, and white ones, and red and white stripy ones. I also like broad beans and butter beans. NB: the original line in The Silence of the Lambs was ' ... with fava beans and a big Amarone' but they downmarketed the wine for the movie.
24. Do you swear a lot?
Yes, but I think it sounds dreadfully naff when other people do it so am trying to stop.
25. Where did you get the shirt you're wearing?
27. Do you use an alarm clock?
On the rare occasions when I need an alarm I use my trusty if ancient Nokia mobile.
28. Where was your default MySpace picture taken?
Does the expression 'begging the question' mean anything to you?
29. Do you ever snort when you laugh?
Jesus, I hope not.
30. Whats the first thing you notice on the opposite sex?
What a bizarre question. Probably aberrant or daggy clothes, like socks with sandals.
31. Is cheating ever okay?
Heck no, I always cover my exam paper with my arm.
32. Do you want someone you can't have?
Not at the moment, no, but 'twas not always thus.
34. Do you wear underwear?
I deduce that 'underwear' here means 'underpants'. Yes indeed; I think going commando is strictly for those under three. And what's more I often favour what Zoe calls 'nanna pants'.
35. Do you wear a bra?
Yes. Several different ones, in fact. There's a cheap red lace number I particularly like.
36. What Size?
Mind your beeswax.
37. Are you a social or an antisocial person?
Half and half, often at the same time.
39. Do you have a tan?
My mother was a flaming redhead. My driving arm is usually a bit tinted by the end of summer, but apart from that, no.
45. Are you afraid of the dark?
I grew up in a farmhouse down a 200-metre dirt track from an unsealed road leading to an extremely small town. Nope, not afraid of the dark.
[Questions 40-44 missing, who knows why.]
47. Do you miss someone today?
Not really. I miss my mum all the time, but I'm guessing that's not what you meant.
49. Do you still have pictures of you & your exs?
Two or three, lying about somewhere.
50. Who's always there for you no matter what?
My sisters. And my dad. Hence the kissing (see #1).